Drew Carey credited as playing...
Ted
- Ted: I'll tell you what Jeff: you're the best liar I ever employed. If you can look me in the eye and tell me you actually like Alan, I'll make him a full partner.
- Jeff Winger: Well, I only ever really liked one person: my mom. She liked my dad. And after all the dust and custody was settled, the guy I really admired - not liked, admired - was the lawyer leaving the courthouse in the great looking suit and the sky-blue Mercedes SLK.
- Ted: [nodding] Sweet ride.
- Jeff Winger: Sweet job. Sweet life! He didn't care, he couldn't care! And the less he cared, the better he was. We are a special breed because we rise above the sloppy stuff and look at the bottom line. You want to like your employees? Open a hair salon. You want to win? Make Alan partner.