Blake Lively credited as playing...
Emily Nelson
- Sean Townsend: [to Dante] I would rather shave my balls with a rusty knife than be at this wedding.
- Emily Nelson: Oh, let me do that for you.
- Stephanie Smothers: [about Sean's death] Not to be callous, but this solves a lot of problems for you.
- Emily Nelson: Wow, that was callous. And yeah, I guess it does.
- Emily Nelson: Thanks to you, I'm getting married.
- Stephanie Smothers: How did that happen?
- Emily Nelson: Oh, you know, the good, old-fashioned way.
- Stephanie Smothers: Bathroom sex?
- Emily Nelson: [toasting over martinis] To old friends... new beginnings.
- Stephanie Smothers: And not getting poisoned.
- Stephanie Smothers: We've all seen "The Godfather", you know? It doesn't work out great for Diane Keaton.
- Emily Nelson: Hmm. Well, Diane Keaton didn't write her ending. I write mine.
- Emily Nelson: Can you not be day drunk around my kid?
- Sean Townsend: Day drunk?
- Emily Nelson: Yeah, it might help if you sober up a little.
- Sean Townsend: You're judging me, are you? We're all here because of you and your fucking wedding or whatever...
- Emily Nelson: [interrupting Sean by talking to Dante] My love, Dante, this is my baby mama, Sean.
- Dante Versano: Oh, yeah. Hey, it's the one?
- Emily Nelson: Uh-huh, yeah.
- Dante Versano: [offering Sean a handshake] Hi. It means a great deal that you're here.
- Sean Townsend: [ignoring the handshake offer] Oh. I mean, the courts ordered me to drag my son across an ocean, so you must be paying your lawyers an awful amount, because we're here
- Dante Versano: [chuckling] Yeah. I'm still glad that you're here to celebrate our marriage.
- Sean Townsend: Well, 'celebrate' is quite the strong word, because I would rather shave my balls with a rusty knife than be at this wedding.
- Emily Nelson: Oh, let me do that for you!
- Sean Townsend: Yeah? Please. But you know what?
- [Sean clinks his liquor glass lightly to Dante's chest]
- Sean Townsend: Here we are. Anyway, it's your funeral, pal.