Seth MacFarlane credited as playing...
Peter Griffin • Stewie Griffin • Brian Griffin • Glenn Quagmire • Dr. Elmer Hartman • President Snow • God • Father • Dyslexic Baseball Wrap-Up Announcer
- Stewie Griffin: [Speaking to a drunk Peter] You should know that mom has emotionally let you go. It won't be long before she takes a lover. She already has 2 cell phones.
- Peter Griffin: Was Beowulf a Teen Wolf sequel with Scott Baio?
- Joe Swanson: No.
- Peter Griffin: [sighs] Then I just totally failed that Medieval Lit. midterm.
- Peter Griffin: Quagmire, if you're gonna be married to a whore, you're gonna need to have a sense of humor.
- Peter Griffin: Where will you two be going on your scummymoon? And can I plan your bridal golden shower.
- Peter Griffin: [visiting Harvard] You guys notice how many Asians there are at this school? I mean, how'd they all get so smart?
- Glenn Quagmire: I dunno. Guess that's the way God made them.
- [Cut to God addressing a board meeting]
- God: [unveils Asian man] Gentlemen, I give you... the Asian. Compact. Hairless. And fiercely intelligent. The penises, while tiny, are extremely efficient. We're projecting ten billion within five years. Also there'll be different varieties, that will all hate each other for some reason.
- Board member: Do they eat just, like, regular food?
- God: Oh-ho-o, no, no. The opposite.