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Dennis Bateman, Gary Schwartz, and Rick May in Expiration Date (2014)

Nolan North: Engineer • Soldier

Expiration Date

Nolan North credited as playing...

Engineer • Soldier

Quotes3

  • Engineer: Guys! Hey fellas, listen! It's just bread that gets tumors!
  • Medic: Not even tumors! It's some form of self-aware beauty mark zhat only metastasizes in an environment of pure wheat! Here, vatch zhis!
  • [shakes specimen jar]
  • Medic: Oh look! It hates me so much!
  • Engineer: So, we're fine! Long as nobody teleports any bread.
  • Soldier: Question.
  • Engineer: [chuckles] What's your question, Soldier?
  • Soldier: I teleported bread.
  • Engineer: [upset] What?
  • Soldier: You told me to.
  • Engineer: [foreboding] How much?
  • Soldier: I have done nothing but teleport bread for three days.
  • Medic: [urgently] Vhere? Vhere have you been sending it?
  • [ground shakes as bread monster emerges]
  • Engineer: [after he and the Medic show everyone that teleporting bread gives it tumors] Y'all know what this means right?
  • Soldier: [the Soldier suddenly grabs the Scout by the neck and slams him onto the table] Arrghh! We cannot teleport bread anymore!
  • Engineer: [the Engineer intervenes] Whoa! Whoa... Not exactly, Soldier.
  • [he places his hand on the Soldier's back and smiles]
  • Engineer: You teleport as much bread as you like.
  • [he removes his helmet]
  • Engineer: That goes for all of ya. If there's something any of y'all wanted to do before ya... Well. Died. Now would be a... good time.
  • Scout: [while everyone is fighting a giant bread monster that came from Soldier's teleporting of bread] Hey, Miss Pauling. Oh, I am so sorry...
  • Miss Pauling: [Looking up from the wires of a bomb cart she is trying to program] God, Scout, what for? Pressing the one button you're never supposed to press? Do you have any idea what's in a briefcase that -
  • [she spots the watch on Scout's arm]
  • Miss Pauling: - Oh, oh! Give me your watch!
  • [She holds her hand out expectantly]
  • Scout: Yeah. Exactly!
  • [he gives her the watch]
  • Scout: See, that is where this all starts! No, actually, wait...
  • Soldier: [he is interrupted by the Soldier screaming and landing nearby them]
  • [proudly]
  • Soldier: HA HA HA! I TELEPORTED BREAD!
  • Scout: [the Soldier is grabbed by one of the monster's tentacles and dragged away] ... so that brings me to the point of this story, which is I like you, and you should probably be sitting for this...
  • Miss Pauling: GUYS! CLOSE THE BLAST DOORS!
  • Scout: Miss Pauling. Look, my last few hours I just wanted...
  • Heavy: [Struggling to keep the blast doors open for them to escape through] COME ON!
  • Scout: Um, never mind...
  • Miss Pauling: RUN!

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