Kat Dennings: Max Black

And the Fun Factory

Max Black

Han Lee: Thank you, everyone, for staying late to learn our new iPad order system.
Earl: We had no choice. You locked the door from the outside.
Han Lee: Either way, we're learning.
Caroline Channing: Han, why would we update your order system when our uniforms are from the 1970's and our paychecks are from the 1800s?
Han Lee: Let's get to the tutorial. Max, you and I are going to role-play.
Max Black: All right, you can be the little bitch and I'll be me.
Oleg: I don't need this lesson. I'm very familiar with the touch screen. Let's just say I put the "goo" in Google.
Han Lee: I'm going to pretend I'm a customer and order a hamburger. Hello, Miss. I'll have a hamburger.
Max Black: Certainly, Miss. Would you like that with or without Salmonella?

Caroline Channing: Um, hi. Should we just come in? The door is open.
Ace: Yep, always is. Doors create boundaries. Boundaries are a bummer. You know what else is a bummer?
Max Black: Tall guys with small penises?

Max Black: [Max and Caroline are watching Sophie ruffle her hands through Han Lee's hair] This is like watching your gerbil hump a pencil. Not really sexual, but still grosses you out.

Max Black: Here you go, Earl.
Earl: Max, what's wrong? You seem happy.
Max Black: I'm just still on a high from this $10,000 bank loan I got last week. And from an almost certainty laced pot brownie I ate in 2004.
Earl: I can't believe you and Caroline got a bank loan for your cupcake business and not a single hostage was involved.
Caroline Channing: [Max walks away from Earl and Caroline comes over to Max] Max, you don't have $10,000. You don't even have Netflix.

Caroline Channing: Oh, hi, Peggy. How are you? Would you like to join us and talk about work?
Carmen: Why don't we talk about you to skanks getting the hell out of here?
Max Black: And I thought we were bad waitresses.
Peggy: This is Carmen. She works at the factory too. We're BFFs, and she's one of the owner's like me.
Carmen: Yeah, and she's a 100 percent owner of Rico, so hands off! We seen you too sitting here like you're God's frigging gift.
Peggy: I know, right? And not for nothing. But Rico's pit bull doesn't like other girls.
Max Black: [Peggy and Carmen start to walk away] I'm guessing that's his pit bull.
[Max points to Carmen but Peggy and Carmen hear this and turn around slowly glaring at them]