Kristen Schaal credited as playing...
Louise Belcher
- Bob Belcher: There must be something I can do to get in. You know what? I'm gonna walk down there and talk to the garden master.
- Linda Belcher: Oh, Cynthia? Good luck with that piece of work.
- Louise Belcher: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Cynthia as in Logan's mom? As in Logan, my archenemy?
- Bob Belcher: Yeah.
- Louise Belcher: Tell her to tell Logan he's a...
- [blows raspberry]
- Louise Belcher: and his head looks like...
- [blows raspberry]
- Louise Belcher: and his face sounds like...
- [blows raspberry]
- Louise Belcher: . He'll know what it means.
- Bob Belcher: I... uh, I probably won't do that, Louise.
- Louise Belcher: Do you want me to write it down then?
- Bob Belcher: Um, yeah, go ahead.
- Bob Belcher: Louise, I really, really want this garden. Plus, it will be good for all of us. We're gonna grow fresh produce for the restaurant. Doesn't that sound great?
- Louise Belcher: Dad, I'm nine. I spit out vegetables and hide them around the house.
- Louise Belcher: [to Bob] It's a joke. You'd never really hire Logan.
- Bob Belcher: It's just temporary, Louise. Logan's mom was nice enough to find me a plot at the community garden because...
- Logan: Because he gave me this crappy job.
- Bob Belcher: It's not crappy. Don't... don't say that, but if your mom asks, it's... it's crappy.
- Louise Belcher: This is a terrible idea, Dad. You've taken the only good thing about this restaurant: its lack of Logan and you added Logan!
- Logan: That is not appropriate for the workplace.
- Louise Belcher: You are not appropriate for the workplace!
- Logan: You're not appropriate for your face!
- Louise Belcher: I don't know if I can take Logan much longer before I slap that mess.
- Linda Belcher: Yeah, how long is this gonna last, Bob?
- Bob Belcher: Uh, probably just until Logan gets into that summer program thing and then we're home free, rolling in arugula. So just try and ignore Cynthia and Logan.
- Louise Belcher: Start slapping faces. Got it.
- Bob Belcher: No! No slapping. Just ignoring.
- Louise Belcher: Fine. But just so you know, I got this guy and this guy, and they're ready to go to work.
- Linda Belcher: Everything's going great! I was just about to proofread Cynthia's essay with my foot.
- Louise Belcher: And I was just gonna use my hands to make a Logan face sandwich.
- Louise Belcher: [to Bob about Logan] Wait, you're paying this butt brain?
- Logan: My butt does have brains. They're called turds and they're smarter than you.
- Louise Belcher: Hey, Mom, how you doing?
- Linda Belcher: Good.
- Louise Belcher: So, are we really sure this Logan thing is worth it? I mean, Dad's a family member, but he's ranked, like, 4th or 5th.
- Linda Belcher: Louise, it's not that bad. Plus, your father needs this and you owe him one. You de-zested his zester. Let him have the garden.
- [Louise groans]
- Linda Belcher: Sometimes you just got to be around people you don't like.
- Cynthia: [as she comes into the restaurant] Oh, look at this place.
- Linda Belcher: Oh, God, it's her.