Glen Powell credited as playing...
Chad Radwell
- Chad Radwell: I'm in love with you.
- Dean Cathy Munsch: Of course you are. Cuz that's the only way this situation could get more depressing. Please leave.
- Chad Radwell: I will, but I'm gonna take a pair of your panties.
- Dean Cathy Munsch: I'm gonna barf on your face unless you get out of here!
- Chad Radwell: Yes, I could find a random girl who wasn't popular and, yes, if I started dating her, she would then become popular... Dude, that is a great idea for a movie! Somebody should make that movie!
- Boone Clemens: We should make that movie!
- Chad Radwell: I would see that movie!
- Boone Clemens: Me too. You know who should direct that movie? Michael Bay, the greatest director of all time.
- Dean Cathy Munsch: Go take a psychology course. Try to figure out who gave you such disgusting mommy issues.
- Chad Radwell: It was, you know, probably my mom.
- Chad Radwell: I can't go date a girl who was popular and then just stopped being popular.
- Boone Clemens: Because that would be crazy!
- Chad Radwell: It's crazy! And nobody's gonna go see that movie. Do you know why nobody's gonna go see that movie? Because it never got made.
- Chad Radwell: My ego, it's super-strong. Okay? But it's not strong enough that I can just go around dating garbage people.
- Dean Cathy Munsch: You are awful in bed! Are you aware? I mean, just the worst.
- Chad Radwell: What-what? Did I not take you there?
- Dean Cathy Munsch: Look what I've stooped to. Getting sex by blackmailing students on academic probation.
- Chad Radwell: I'm gonna call ya.
- Dean Cathy Munsch: As I can't destroy every phone on earth, that'll remain a possibility.
- Chad Radwell: Hold up, are you saying dead bodies don't turn you on?
- Chanel Oberlin: Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying!
- Chad Radwell: You are so lame, you know that? God, I love all that death stuff. I got my first boner watching Faces of Death.
- Chad Radwell: Look, I don't have to tell you, Chanel, with Kappa suddenly filled with weirdos and fatties there is literally no way you can be popular. And I need you to stay popular cuz if you want to stay at the top of the list of the pieces of ass I'm gettin', there's criteria. And the criteria is you gotta be popular!
- Chanel Oberlin: You said you loved me!
- Chad Radwell: I do sort of love you. I just... I would love you a lot more if other people loved you too.
- Chad Radwell: I need you to leave, okay? I need you to leave because you're bummin' me out and you're bummin' Boone out and we're just trying to have a nice day hittin' golf balls at hippies.