Ray Santiago: Pablo Simon Bolivar

Bait

Pablo Simon Bolivar

Pablo Simon Bolivar: Look, Ash, I think you're really being paranoid about this. If Kelly's mom is one of "them", why wouldn't she have killed her before we got here?
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Because she's tryin' to reel in the bigger fish. Don't you get it? If you snag a little fish, you're not gonna eat it. No, you use it as a bait fish, to catch the whale. I'm the whale, Pablo.
Pablo Simon Bolivar: Yeah, I got that.
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: And Kelly...
Pablo Simon Bolivar: She's the bait.
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Yeah, that's right. Unfortunately for Mom, this whale swam in there with a big ol' shotgun. She was waiting for me to drop my guard. That's why she's inviting us to dinner.
Pablo Simon Bolivar: Well, for the record, I think she's a real mom, this is my chance to impress Kelly's parents. So, can you just do me a solid, please? And just, be polite in there.
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Oh, I'll be polite. Right up until I'm rude.

Pablo: That was the scariest thing that's ever happened to me, I thought I was dead. But then it was so cool when you said, "Thanks for the heads up." At first I was like, "Did he mean it like that?" And then I realized, "He's the Jefe, of course he did."
Ash: This ain't my first rodeo, kid.

Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Pablo, focus up. Just stay behind me, let the boomstick do the talking. Things get hairy, you use your bottle.
Pablo Simon Bolivar: Um, I don't think it's a very good weapon, Jefe. You had to stab Roper, like, fifty times.
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Hey, I was sharpening it for you.

[Ash and Pablo ride down the road, both soaked in blood]
Pablo Simon Bolivar: Is this what it's like to be you?
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Yep, pretty much. Never killed my boss before, so that was new.

Pablo Simon Bolivar: Ash, I know you said that when I got hit I'd know what to do, but I just got hit and I don't know what to do!

Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Okay, here's the plan: We bust in there, we fight through the carnage, we bail with the book.
Pablo Simon Bolivar: Okay, yeah. Oh God, what if Kelly's mom gave Kelly the evil force and then you have to cut off Kelly's head...
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Pablo! Focus up.

Pablo Simon Bolivar: If Kelly's mom is one of them, why wouldn't she have killed her *before* we got here?
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Because she's trying to reel in the bigger fish, don't you get it? If you snag a little fish, you're not gonna eat it, no. You use it as a bait fish to catch the whale.
[awkward pause]
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: I'm the whale, Pablo.
Pablo Simon Bolivar: Yeah, I got that.

Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: You don't believe mom's horseshit story, do ya? She's a deadite! And I think dad is too.
Pablo Simon Bolivar: Her mom, she doesn't even have the crazy white eyes. I noticed they're brown and lovely like her daughter's.
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: Yeah, I remember when I was like you. Young, dumb, full of... conflicting emotions.

Pablo Simon Bolivar: Ash, I'm not sorry that I took your book to get you to come up here.
Ashley 'Ash' J. Williams: I'm not either. Sometimes a whale needs his bait fish to remind him of where he is in the ocean... Or something like that. Anyway, thanks, buddy.