Jason Ralph credited as playing...
Quentin Coldwater
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: If Martin killed The Beast, would we be here now talking about him?
- Quentin Coldwater: Yeah, but here's the thing.
- [Reads]
- Quentin Coldwater: "So little did Martin know he would fail to recover the blade, which would remain hidden for decades". Which means it could still be sitting somewhere waiting for us.
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: Right, in Fillory. The place where The Beast is.
- Eliot Waugh: Ergo, fuck that.
- Alice Quinn: You're just upset 'cause you may never get to go to Fillory.
- Quentin Coldwater: No, that would be stupid.
- Alice Quinn: Quentin...
- Quentin Coldwater: Why would I want to go? The child-molesting demon who incidentally wrote my favorite books is there waiting to kill us.
- Margo Hanson: What are we planning?
- Quentin Coldwater: Nothing yet. Just discussing how we're all probably gonna die before we even set foot in Fillory because the Neitherlands are full of mercenaries.
- Margo Hanson: Sounds like a problem.
- Quentin Coldwater: Point is, we need some serious battle magic.
- Margo Hanson: But that stuff's illegal.
- [Quentin gives her a look]
- Margo Hanson: I'm fucking with you. I'm in.
- Eliot Waugh: I'm in too. I heard the word "illegal".
- Margo Hanson: There's this thing about you, Q. You actually believe in magic.
- Quentin Coldwater: So does everyone.
- Margo Hanson: No. We all knows it's real, but you believe in it. And you just love it, pure and simple.
- Eliot Waugh: We're not learning anything new. In every scenario, The Beast comes next week.
- Quentin Coldwater: There was one time we didn't all die: when we went to Fillory.
- Eliot Waugh: No. Everything went white. It's not necessarily better.
- Alice Quinn: Well, I agree with Quentin.
- Margo Hanson: Oh, that's because he blows you.
- Quentin Coldwater: Seriously, eight tries. We get seven deaths, one mysterious? Give me that.
- Quentin Coldwater: Where did you get this? Is this, like, from World War II?
- Eliot Waugh: I tripped and fell on it locked in a drawer in Sunderland's office.
- Alice Quinn: My Japanese is a little rusty, but I think that this says, "Majikku misairu".
- Quentin Coldwater: "Magic missile"? That's, like, straight-up "Dungeons & Dragons.
- Margo Hanson: What if we got guns?
- Quentin Coldwater: What? No. No, look, this is basic prime directive. Fillory is a pristine, non-industrialized society. You can't-...
- Eliot Waugh: Oh, yes, very pristine. It's been taken over by a kiddie-diddling mutant.
- Quentin Coldwater: Yeah, and that's not Fillory's fault.
- Margo Hanson: Great. Let's go native. Scale of one to ten, how are you with a broadsword, Quentin?
- Quentin Coldwater: [after "Bottling" their emotions via spell] This must be what undergoing the Vulcan ritual of Kolinahr is like.
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: I like your sweater.
- Quentin Coldwater: Are you saying that to be cruel?
- William 'Penny' Adiyodi: No. I like your sweater. I saw no reason not to share
- Eliot Waugh: Remember that spring? At the foot of the mountains in Fillory?
- Quentin Coldwater: It was Chatwin's Torrent. Thought you didn't remember the books.
- Eliot Waugh: Rupert was wounded, right? Till the spring healed his leg? Do you think it's real?
- Quentin Coldwater: Some of the good parts have to be. At least I hope so. Why?
- Eliot Waugh: Because I probably have liver damage.
- Quentin Coldwater: So Martin's desperate, 'cause the Plover had figured out a way to change physically, which opened up a whole new class of spellwork, which meant that pretty soon he'd be able to follow Martin into Fillory.
- Eliot Waugh: Urgh.
- Quentin Coldwater: Yeah. So Martin got a line on an enchanted knife, the Leo. Uh Yeah, powerful enough to tear through the fabric of magic itself - like, kill a god. So qualified to murder a fairly invincible mutant Magician.