Timothy Olyphant credited as playing...
Joel Hammond
- Joel Hammond: You can't eat our neighbor.
- Sheila Hammond: He's knee deep in his herb garden - the man is seasoning himself.
- Dan Palmer: Just wondering, what kind of spray are you using on those ants of yours?
- Joel Hammond: What kind of ant spray?
- Dan Palmer: You told me you were spraying ants in the middle of the night. Now, I wanna know, what kind of spray you were using.
- Joel Hammond: I don't know... Ants Away... Ants-Be-Gone... Fuck You Ants...?
- Joel Hammond: [Looking in wallet] Porsche guy was from Nevada. He owned a strip club and a waste management company.
- Sheila Hammond: Well, nothing sketchy there. Any family photos?
- Joel Hammond: I found pictures of a few women, but they were taken from inside a toilet, so probably not serious relationships.
- Joel Hammond: Why is it so hard to find someone to kill? Every time I get coffee, there's some dipshit yelling at the barista.
- Sheila Hammond: I feel bad lying to her but I don't want Abby to know that her parents are going to be killing people.
- Joel Hammond: Yeah, she thinks so little of us already.
- Sheila Hammond: You know, I gotta say, sometimes your pot smoking bugs me.
- Joel Hammond: Well, I don't like that you're gonna be killing and eating people, so we both have things that bug us. And by the way, they're legalizing my thing.
- Sheila Hammond: [holding an arm like it was a hoagie] Man, this guy really hit the spot.
- Joel Hammond: I just stuffed a man in a meat freezer. Cross that off my bucket list.