It is a curious delight to hear of a new film project from Richard Driscoll. A varied filmography, his horror credits as director/producer include 'Kannibal (2001)', featuring Driscoll in the title role of Hannibal Lector wannabe Kavanagh, and 'Evil Calls (2008)', featuring Driscoll as central character George Carney. Both films exist in a variety of formats and titles. Both ventures have earned Driscoll a dubious reputation as film-maker, both for the end result and for goings-on behind the scenes.
Here, after some time away, Driscoll returns with the sporadically released 'Grindhouse Nightmares', a stagebound production featuring 80s 'scream queen' Linnea Quigley as punk/nurse/zombie narrator. Filmed in close-up, she offers a kind of tatty 'Elvira' type of wide-eyed presentation. Her looks to off-camera cue-cards indicate this might be the first time she's seen her script, such as it is. She introduces the first vignette featuring Steve Munroe as Sam, chained up in a dark, dripping, rat-infested cavern whilst a disembodied voice (Vass Anderson) guides him through the 'game'. Things fail to progress much for one-note, hapless 'Sammy', who taunts his captor with gems like "I f***** your wife, with my big fat c*** right into her big flamingo."
After this episode ends, some eye-popping fake commercials show up. I won't give away the kind of thing you're in for, but let's put it this way: Driscoll's features may have often been accused of taking themselves too seriously in the past - to say that is not the case here is an understatement. This parody ad-break (featuring clips from Driscoll's 'Eldorado') is unlike anything you've ever seen: a cross between David Lynch and The Young Ones, in the gaudy style of 80s straight-to-video productions. You could say the joke goes on far too long, but there is no punch-line. In fact, despite the brief inclusion of comic actor Robin Askwith, there is no real joke, just some sniggering schoolboy 'Viz'-style moments.
Johnny Depp lookalike Danny Lopez, Britney Spears lookalike Lorna Bliss and special guest Brigitte Nielson feature in 'Stripper with a Shotgun', the second and final act. A spattering of wavering American accents, an 'ass-kicking scene' featuring Batman-style (the 60's TV variety) 'ker-blam' moments, 84 year-old Vass Anderson discussing his genitals with Bliss's shackled, naked Nun, this has it all. "Now that is what I call ... Grindhouse," Quigley tells us. Music is supplied in part by Buster Bloodvessel no less, and available on 'House of Fear' records. Find it if you can -I can't!
Typically, this needs to be seen to be believed. It is stranger, possibly, than Driscoll's other projects. It lacks the comparative production sheen of his other works, but that might be deliberate, inkeeping with the downbeat exploitation style of it all. It emerges with all the incomprehensibility that has become something of a trademark, leading you to wonder just what it is you have just watched.
