art-45

I rented Tora Tora Tora last night just to remind myself that there was a time when film makers could crank out a really good movie. I guess there's a good reason why Disney decided to replace most of the interesting build-up to the attack with a gawd awful soap opera. The film should have been called, "Nurses of Pearl Harbor." the night we saw this film there were about a dozen people in the theater. Maybe the word is out.

I felt like I was at one of those family reunion things where I know everyone belongs to someone but I'm just not sure who until it starts raining frogs. Does that make sense? Of course it does. It's perfectly logical. You see, if it starts raining frogs then where you are is not real and it's not happening unless, of course, it's really raining frogs. You must see this movie for all this to come together like it obviously did for me.

When Alvin spends $350 for a John Deer lawn mower to transport himself 265 miles to see his sick and estranged brother, I was wondering why he just didn't buy a bus ticket. Since this is a true story, I'm still wondering. At some point, Alvin does mumble something about not liking buses but it didn't sound very convincing. Hey, he looked pretty darn happy when he hitches a ride on a bus full of old ladies. So, here's a man that leaves his somewhat retarded daughter to wonder where he is for about a month, he uses corn fields for a bathroom and I'm supposed to get all teary eyed watching him ride a lawn mower down a state highway. There's a scene in a bar when Alvin exchanges war stories with another old guy and I was expecting him to reveal some battlefield trauma he'd received that would explain his bazaar lawn mower trip. Wonder how he got home.

My way cool old folks crowd enjoyed this movie. I wouldn't say we were nuts about it, but it sure was better then most of the summer duds like 'Autumn in NY.' Just goes to show you that an acceptable movie can be made without blowing stuff up, using the "f" word and way-to-close-ups of tongue kisses. Even Dax, the super cool babe layer, refused to be seen naked (we thank him for that.)

This could have been an OK movie but I had an uncomfortable feeling that no one involved really cared. I'm wondering how many "out takes" ended up in the final product. What was the terrible crime Nolte, Bridges and Stone kept buried for 20 years? Nolte carries around a shoe box that should have received top billing for all the attention it gets. I thought surely it must contain a foot (at the very least) to justify so much mystery. Well, turns out (spoiler) it's full of some very tame porn shots that were used in a blackmail scheme that's the basis of this rather lame movie. All that said, it's worth a home viewing. (Send the kids from the room during the horse stud service scene)