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wendlandj
Reviews
Eragon (2006)
Some things should not go in a blender
Here's how I picture it. Some Hollywood producers were brainstorming money making schemes...
"Star Wars made a ton of money, and so did Lord of the Rings. We need money like that - big money."
"Don't forget Harry Potter and the Matrix - they made big money too."
"We should mix their scripts together - it would be a sure thing."
"Someone will notice - we'll look like idiots."
"Not if we add another movie - something older so it won't be obvious."
"How about Highlander? No one remembers that do they?"
"Good idea - run with it. We're gonna be rich!"
I can't say enough bad about the script. Every step was obvious and inevitable - and you could tell which movie they were copying in each scene. The continuity wasn't even any good. It's bright outside - now it's pouring rain - now it's bright again. Large props appear out of nowhere while they are traveling with no baggage in the wilderness. Everyone conveniently has a second horse with them for when they happen on Eragon...
The list goes on and on. This movie was shamelessly patched together out of scraps of formula and the result is about as attractive as Frankenstein's monster. My sympathies to Jeremy Irons, John Malkovich, Rachel Weiss and Christopher Paolini - I'm sure they didn't get any input into this train wreck and their considerable talents were squandered.
Points for the dragon animation though - I felt as bad for her as for the live actors which means I totally bought that she was real. She deserved to be in a better movie though.
Bloodsucking Pharaohs in Pittsburgh (1991)
Airplane meets Horror
This movie is just chock full of visual jokes and running gags. The fun never stops and the blood is so clearly fake, and the murders so whimsical in method, that even the most squeamish will probably have no problem with it.
The story centers around a series of gristly murders where taunting messages are left by the killer - written in hieroglyphics. When the Pittsburgh police find the first hieroglyphic note they sigh, "The Egyptian side of town". With such brilliant breaks with reality this movie is a magnificent romp through the looking glass.
Worth viewing for the stop smoking clinic sequence alone - Give it a try! Like Buckaroo Bonsai? Like Big Trouble in Little China? Don't mind low budgets? This movie is for you!
Destiny Turns on the Radio (1995)
Give it a chance
I don't know why this movie is always so poorly rated. From my point of view this is a fast paced movie with a little bit of everything: romance, car chases, music, crime, comedy, and a healthy serving of the surreal. I own a copy of this movie and I have watched it many times without getting tired of it - so why does the rest of the viewing community have it in for this little diamond in the rough?
The chemistry between Dylan McDermott and Nancy Travis sizzles and James LeGros makes a charming quirky sidekick. I could have lived without the Bobcat Goldthwait cameo, but when isn't that the case?
Here's a good acid test: if you liked Toys, L.A. Story or the Linguini Incident then you'll like Destiny Turns on the Radio.