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Okay, I made a previous comment praising this movie in the sense of good spirit because I liked the actors and their performances even though I horribly dread it compared to Curse of the Black Pearl. However, now that I have indulged myself in metaphorical rum, I have come to realize that I was way too forgiving of this movie.

Firstly, the flaws in the content were abysmal: The plot was overloaded with action, devoid of all the quaint, understated humor of the original (ex: "why is the rum gone?"). This movie has had its heart ripped out, much like Davy Jones. If you enjoy action heavy movies, by all means go see Dead Man's Chest. However, if you repeatedly watch Curse of the Black Pearl for nostalgia's sake and miss the subtle humor and small production feel, you will cry with agony 10 minutes into this movie. This movie takes itself way too seriously.

Secondly, the only thing that redeems this movie while simultaneously condemning it is that all the glitz distracts you from the picture's lack of soul. To the special effects team, photo-real animation can be distracting when used too much! CG effects in general can be a distraction when used too much. This is a prime example of special effects gone wrong! In fact, the movie is so weighed down by its special effects that the actors don't get a chance to act (hence lack of soul). I don't blame the actors, because they did a brilliant job on The Curse of the Black Pearl so I believe they know their stuff.

Thirdly, I felt the time slip through my fingers. After 2.5 hours of my life that I will never get back, I walked out of the theatre with a gigantic headache. Too many motives/ sub-plots! Arrg. Will vs his father vs Davy Jones, the Commadore vs Will, Will vs Jack, Jack vs Davy Jones vs The East India Company vs Elizabeth! What ever happened to plot line 101? The protagonist-antagonist ratio is on overload. The whole confusing mess comes to an apex when the Commadore, Jack, Will, Elizabeth, and Davy Jone's crew fight ALL at once on the island where Davy Jone's heart is buried. Not only does it give you a headache to watch, but because of all the diverging plot lines, nothing gets resolved. Annoying.

I will conclude with this. I am going to see Pirates 3 because I still enjoyed Captain Jack Sparrow and his smart, witty exchanges with Ms. Elizabeth. I am determined to see what becomes of their relationship. But more importantly I hope Jerry Bruckheimer can fix what he broke... the hearts of Pirates fans everywhere. However, because the crew shot some of Pirates 3 (w/o a script) while still filming Dead Man's Chest, I think things are off to a shaky start. Jumping the gun to save money is economically savvy but not too wise with all these summer half-baked movies. First I was commandeered onto the X3 (shoot me now) band wagon, and now something worse? Still, I hold out hope. Until then I will dive into the metaphorical bottle of rum.

"We're devils, we're black sheep, and really bad eggs. Drink up me hearties, yo ho!"

I mean come on, they're so hanging on for a sequel. Every cast member says its not gonna happen but with an ending like that it would be a crime not to have a sequel. Then again, the plot line is deflated enough, so maybe they just made the park ending and the bedside ending as a reason for fans to hope who wanted to rip their hair out when Rogue, Magneto, and Mystique get stripped of their powers and Jean, Scott, and Prof X get killed. After all, the whole theme of the first movie was hope, so I think they ended it the way they did in a desperate attempt to bring the theme full-circle. Anyone who has seen the movie all the way to the end, past the credits, knows what I'm talking about. Anyone who hasn't, pay the money and go see the movie again. Brett Ratner, in my opinion, is trying to soften the blow to his fans about the whole "Cure" plot line. But for god sake, if you're going to have Prof X in another body and Magneto tip over a metal chess piece in the ending shot, then when Rogue touches Bobby he should fall over on the ground in pain and she should be like "Ha, that's for flirting with Kitty!" Overall, A+ special effects, but the movie needed to be longer if they wanted to put in those new characters and develop them properly and do them justice. Juggernaut gets a one line intro, how retarded is that. And the whole "cure" part of the script was just lame. If you're gonna put and end to the X-men, you don't do it by stripping their powers. It's a huge let down to comic book fans everywhere. The whole plot other than "the cure" basically revolves around Wolverine and Pheonix/Jean. Xavier and Cyclops get killed off too early to have any real substance in the story. Bobby and Rogue barely get two words in together, and the only verbal transaction between Wolverine and Rouge is like 2 seconds long. The only reason it gets a 9 out of 10 from me is because I loved the first two movies, the comic book series in general, and because the script backed itself into a corner but turned out decently in spite of all the writing challenges.