plasticmask

IMDb member since April 2021
    Lifetime Total
    25+
    IMDb Member
    3 years, 2 months

Reviews

Chance
(2016)

Dreadful
I don't like Hugh Laurie, but that's not his fault. He just works with what he's given. Even the TERRIBLE scripts he was given on a Saturday Night Live episode were done as well as he could manage. I respect him; I just don't like him.

I thought "House" was an absolutely unrealistic and frightening show. Were MY Doctor stoned all of the time and getting away with it, I would be terrified. It made me want to carefully observe the pupils of every Doctor I meet in ERs (and I still do).

Thought that this show would be different, since Hugh is, after all, merely an actor. But this show DRAGGED. It was BORING.

I made it through the entire first season, somehow managing to stay awake, because I am home-bound and have nothing better to do.

Again, it's unrealistic with it's fantasy quack psychology-base, there's not enough action to keep me interested, and I had to speed past so much irrelevant sex that the episodes were much shorter than purported (which was actually a relief, once I thought about it).

The ONLY difference between this show and House was that he was a VERY poor shrink with no real ethics, rather than a drug-addled sarcastic and hateful doctor in a hospital. Oh and a lot of cursing all round. Just pointing out the differences; it was obviously a cable series rather than a network series.

I'm not going to bother with the second season. My advice is that you don't bother with the FIRST.

The Lair
(2022)

Just Awful
"You can't make a horror/action film for under a grand." "Hold my beer." Horrid thing was the movie's plot itself, cookie-cutter and insulting to the human brain.

The set appeared to have been rented or just used from some other movie(s).

I can't imagine anyone above the age of twelve deriving any enjoyment whatsoever from this movie, and I wouldn't even recommend that a twelve year old watch this thing.

The set was cheap, the antagonists were cheap.

The protagonists were cheap, no-name "actors" who can NOT act, probably had to take their days off from Jack in the Box to make this movie for a few extra dollars.

I wish that I had looked here on this site prior to wasting such a short but valuable part of my life watching this movie.

Oh. In case I'd forgotten to mention: I DO NOT RECOMMEND THIS MOVIE.

12 Monkeys
(2015)

STUPID, POINTLESS AND CONFUSING
I like time temporal stories as much as the next guy. But this is pure tripe. The plot has holes through which you could drive a freight train with MILES to spare all round, and most of the acting is amateur at best like soap opera, insulting at the worst like children's TV. The ONLY reasons that I watched the entire thing was that it was pointlessly violent, which I enjoy, it has good special effects, and because I fell for the rating bots on this site. DO NOT WASTE THREE DAYS OF YOUR LIFE WATCHING THIS. You will only wish that you had watched something else. It is NOT a good television show.

Ostatnia wieczerza
(2022)

Pointless
The movie not only made no sense, it didn't even seem to have much of a plot. It was confusing,silly and stupid. The acting was dreadful, the movie itself was too dark in it's lighting, and the dialogue was muddy. NOTHING was explained, the ending was pointless, the 'hero' was an idiot, the others were almost equally dumb and monotonous. THIN and a complete waste of this viewers time. I do not recommend this movie, even to my worst enemy (if I actually had any enemies to begin with). Trash. Absolute garbage. It made no attempt at even explaining the ending, and I will do my level best to just try to forget that I ever even wasted my time watching it.

Ailiseu
(2009)

Tedious
The acting was okay, but the show was tedious to watch due to the fact that the plot was a dragging mess. I didn't even make it through half of season one, before giving up on it. Not worth the time, in my opinion. Nowhere near enough action. There WAS action, but it was so spread out that I kept wanting to skip ahead throughout the thing. More of a 'romance' than an actual 'action' show. Not my cuppa. I don't recommend it. I don't know what else to say about it, without giving spoilers, but IMDb won't let me submit until I've filled this up with enough characters in the posting. Once again, no recommendation from me.

The Umbrella Academy
(2019)

Needs a few more coats of paint
That last season was horrific in it's writing, it was obvious that they were rushing through it just to get it over with. VERY little of it made sense, TOO MANY questions unanswered, and if I understood what I saw, the third season reduced a "good show, fun to watch" to a low-budget rush that was HUGELY disappointing. Didn't understand it until I watched it twice, and even then it was wretched. A real drag; thought I'd never make it through but I just kept hoping for something interesting to happen.

They also could have left the transgenderism out of it; I understand that the actual actress is going through an identity crisis but WHY PUT IT IN THE SHOW?? Completely not needed. People will watch that, especially during what few action scenes there ARE, and ask themselves over and over: "Who's the little boy?" And that last part was more like a cheap video game than anything else. Kill the monsters, win the... prize? I'm still unclear on what the prize was supposed to be, other than the kids being murdered anyway. I'm so sad that I spent three years of my life looking forward to each new season. Honestly, it's interesting at first but it goes downhill quickly, and you'll find more questions than answers.

Dangerous Men: First Chapter
(2011)

If you can stay awake during this movie, I'll buy you a beer
It was muddy, confusing, the acting woody and amateurish, and the PLOT was so corny I truly thought that I'd never be done with that nonsensical movie. "Chapter One" done in 2011, and here it is, 2022... THAT ALONE should tell you SOMETHING.

Chicago Fire
(2012)

IS THIS A FIREFIGHTING SHOW OR A SOAP OPERA JUST THIS SIDE OF PORN?
I don't KNOW any firefighters, but I am in the medical field managing a 24/7 mid-sized Clinic, and if I strolled round a corner and caught ANY (not just four or six, but ANY} of my crew in a soul-kiss, into my office they would immediately go, to get their discharge papers. In EVERY episode there is almost more sex than firefighting, and DO NOT WATCH THIS WITH YOUR CHILDREN, NOT EVEN YOUR 14-YR-OLDS, unless you WANT to teach them more about romance (which is presented wrongly) NOR firefighting (which I am told is presented wrongly as well).

I've stopped watching it completely. You should too.

Cockneys vs Zombies
(2012)

One of the WORST zombie movies ever made
These things are not supposed to be comedies, and even if they ARE then they should not be in the category "horror". I couldn't make it halfway through. Not worth watching unless you like gore mixed with jokes.

Spiral: From the Book of Saw
(2021)

CHRIS ROCK?!?!?
I can't say that this movie was BAD, not at all. But if I had wanted to watch a comedy, I would have looked for a comedy to watch.

This is supposed to be a "SAW" movie??? It's got FAR too many jokes and clever quips that DID make me chuckle and even laugh a bit, but that is not what SAW movies have EVER had, and it really let me down.

Worth watching, just be prepared for 'something completely different'.

The Purge: Anarchy
(2014)

Incredible! Easily as good, if not better, than the series!
No spoilers here. But you need to watch this, if you watched the series and enjoyed it even HALF AS MUCH as I did. It is well-written, action-packed, and only ONE warning: Make the time to see it, because once you start this movie, you will be glued to your seat staring at your screen, and will not be able to move until it is over.

AWESOME MOVIE, HIGHLY RECOMMEND!

Aniara
(2018)

Sucky; save this part of your life by skipping
The only good thing that I can say about this movie is that the special effects are pretty darned good. Other than that... it's horrid, depressing, and leaves FAR too many questions unanswered. I wish that I'd never seen this on my Hulu list.

City Homicide
(2006)

Australians KNOW how to make a GREAT cop drama
This will be the SECOND time that I've binged this show, the first time having been WELL over a year ago. I'm remembering just barely enough to think "Oh, right, I remember this little bit" but they STILL manage to turn me round with the quick bursts of laughter and the endings. "I didn't recall THAT person being the 'bad guy'!! WOW" Like that and all. HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS SHOW FOR BINGEING on Hulu (where it can now be found)

In the Flesh
(2013)

Enjoyable
WORTH THE WATCH. It's a really great show! You'll be glad that you took the time to watch it!! I won't say any more to avoid accidentally spoiling some of it, but trust me; you will like it a lot!!

Den blomstertid nu kommer
(2018)

DULL
Couldn't make it through the whole thing. Don't understand why it's supposed to be so exciting; I most certainly didn't find it to be that way. I will never know how it ends, and you know, I'm okay with that.

Lethal Weapon
(2016)

It truly was funny at first (NO spoilers here)
I'm still on Season One, watching it on Hulu. The first few episodes were hilarious. I think (just guessing) that they changed writers because I am now up to Ep 15 and there's barely a chuckle that they can choke out of me. It's more drama than comedy, so "Dramady" no longer describes this show. It went downhill FAST, and there are still two seasons to go. Now, it's a drama more than anything else. It's suddenly VERY predictable and just BARELY this side of boring. I'm not saying 'don't watch it', because maybe I simply have lousy taste. But I chose the show because I wanted to laugh for a change, and because I liked the movies, and because I like cop shows a LOT. But as far as I'm concerned at least, it's a soap opera-style show with good acting.

Fear the Walking Dead
(2015)

DEPRESSING
I'm checking the "spoilers" dot, just for the one sentence that I felt truly necessary to write, but I honestly doubt that it "spoils" the show in any way for anyone. Just in case, though, I ticked the dot.

I had read in reviews of TWD that this was supposed to be BETTER than these last few seasons of TWD so I tuned it in.

Didn't get through all of what is currently available on Hulu. COULDN'T get through it. It was just too depressing.

I had thought (from what I'd read) that it was going to be about one of the lesser characters from TWD (look at the photo that they use to advertise the show!) and his son, and the beginning of the Zombie Apocalypse. Turns out, it seems that I was only half right. Won't tell you which half, in case you really want to torture yourself with this show.

I would truly like to think that in the REAL world we won't turn on one another like hyenas when everything goes to hell, but what I'd LIKE to think and the TRUTH are most likely polar opposites, which is deeply depressing and I would rather live in my own personal fantasy about how we'd all come together as a species and conquer the common enemy than watch another second of this probably far-too-realistic (in one sense at least) loser of a show.

If you are a person who is at ALL sensitive or caring when it comes to people, don't watch this show. If you DO, keep any loaded weapons well out of reach, possibly even lock them up. THAT is how depressing this show is. THAT is how disillusioned and utterly saddened this show will make you.

The Silence
(2019)

Deaf people are NOISY!!!!
Writing as a deaf man, I'm here to tell you: We'd be the FIRST TO GO. We can NOT HEAR, right? So we slam doors, toilet seats, clatter dishes, step on branches in the forest, all of that. Why? BECAUSE WE CAN'T BLOODY HEAR IT SO WE DON'T CARE.

The SECOND that the little deaf girl Signed something about "living in silence" like that's going to be a survival trait... I laughed and turned the movie off.

Like I already said: We'd be the FIRST to go. We'd slam a door or something, sneeze, burp, sniff, SOMETHING, and then instantly: crunch-crunch we'd be LUNCH.

STUPID PLOT, STUPID MOVIE.

Don't waste your time.

Cradle 2 the Grave
(2003)

Unrealistic but fun
Oh don't get me wrong; it's a TERRIBLE movie. The plot is just stupid and completely predictable, the acting is awful, the stunts are over-rehearsed and cartoonish, and TOM ARNOLD?? That guy STILL gets work??? WHY?????

BUT!

If you like TONS of action, violence, explosions, blood, etc... which *I* most certainly do, then you'll be able to just barely tolerate this movie.

Being deaf, I didn't care about the soundtrack that everyone seems to be complaining about, but I get it since the captions tell you a lot of the lyrics that make you want to find that singer or (c)rapper, and bring an entire bottle of liquid antibacterial soap with you to force down their throat.

In short: It's a really, really bad movie but if you're bored enough, tune it in.

Free Fire
(2016)

Wretched
The ONLY reason I streamed it is because of the cast.

That should have been a good enough reason; unfortunately, it wasn't.

The entire movie (but for the first few minutes) is made in an abandoned warehouse, so that's where they saved their money so that they could GET that big-name cast.

Everyone shoots at everyone else, nobody can hit anyone with a decent kill shot (and the warehouse is NOT that big), it's supposed to be a "dark comedy" but mostly it's just stupid and I found myself wishing everyone dead by the end of the thing. I laughed a total of ZERO times, didn't even SMILE once, just wanted everyone to die.

Horrid, horrid movie. Go ahead, waste your time. You'll agree.

THE MOVIE MAKES NO SENSE.

Blood Red Sky
(2021)

Terrible
I don't usually enjoy this manner of movie to begin with, and had I any clue that this was going to turn out to be in the genre of which I am SO BORED, I never would have streamed it to begin with.

I honestly thought it was about an airliner hijacking.

It's not.

24 Hours to Live
(2017)

Action PACKED
Guns, explosions, gore, excitement, what the HECK else do you want in a movie?? Fun and edge-of-your-seat entertainment!!!

HIGHLY RECOMMEND.

Avanpost
(2019)

GOOD Movie
Good movie! Russia can make some SUPER movies, and this is on the top of the list, believe me. It's WELL worth streaming.

TONS of action from beginning to end.

You'll think that you have it figured out, but trust me; you won't.

If I told you why I gave it nine stars instead of ten, I'd have to put in a spoiler and I refuse to do that.

Just watch it. You will be glad that you did.

Fantastic Four
(2015)

Good kid's movie
For those wanting a remake of the first one, yep. You're going to be disappointed.

For someone wanting a movie that they can sit and watch with their kids, it's a good one. The invisible girl doesn't have to take off her clothes, for example.

Anyway, there isn't a lot of sense to it, but as I said, it's a KID'S MOVIE so put on your KID GLASSES, sit your KIDS on the couch with you, and enjoy the movie. TONS of action. TONS. It has a LITTLE bit of blood near the end, but you can always distract them with popcorn and gummies. Well worth the watch. It's an original and well thought-out remake of a classic comic book/movie. I don't have kids and recommend it anyway. Just stop picking these movies to shreds, people. Try and enjoy them for what they're intended to be: ENTERTAINMENT. Thanks for reading.

Gunpowder Milkshake
(2021)

Great Fun
Really good movie! Surprised me how good it was, it's streaming on Netflix and so I tuned it in. There's a LOT of bullets, blood, gore, all of the things I like in a movie, plus it made me laugh! I highly recommend this movie for any adult! No nudity for a change, which is a RELIEF, and the use of foul language is just hilarious (I don't want to spoil anything for you).

WATCH THIS MOVIE!! You'll be glad you spent the time! Truly!

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