RogueMonkey

IMDb member since September 2001
    Lifetime Total
    1+
    IMDb Member
    22 years

Reviews

Funny Man
(1994)

Bo' Selecta meets Rent-a-Ghost
If your mansion house needs haunting, just call... the Funnyman. Undecided about whether it's a comedy or a horror, it tries to be both and ends up neither.

The Jester would scare the pants off you if you were eight years old. However, you're not eight any more. Freddy Kruger dressed as Mr Claypole is less scary than Mr Claypole dressed as... er... Mr Claypole.

There is some witty banter, a few funny exchanges of dialogue and some top-drawer 'just nodding' acting. The Club Sexy sequence (up until 'Hardman' meets his end) is the highlight of the film.

With the Jesters big rubber head, I'm reminded of Bo' Selecta – Series 3. Just like Bo' Selecta – Series 3 it could've been good… but it's not.

The Bogus Witch Project
(2000)

Excruciatingly Painful
The second worst film ever made. Spoofs practically write themselves so even a monkey would manage to include at least one minor chuckle over the eternity that this film lasts. This, however, is a guaranteed laugh free zone. A big, fat, hairy, mess made by a collection of talentless, failed, drunken, pretentious drama students.

That said, rarely has a film had such an emotional impact on me. Whilst watching I experienced everything from hatred/anger/fury through despair/depression and all the way to wanting to kill everyone involved and set myself on fire.

Do not watch this film. I'm not joking. It has nothing to offer.

I can only imagine that the day this was made a lot of villages were missing an idiot.

Hotel
(2001)

Genuinely, the worst film I have ever seen
The sniggering from the video store staff should have alerted my attention to the poor choice I had made in deciding to rent "Hotel." Is it really the worst film I've ever seen? Without doubt... and I say this having watched "Bogus Witch Project" (now relegated to the number 2 spot in the all time worst films). Sometimes films are so bad, they're good. This however is so bad it's dug deep, used some industrial mining equipment and broken through to a whole new kind of Hell that no-one knew existed. Truly awful. Everyone involved should be ashamed of themselves. Let us never speak of it again.

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