elionbel
Lifetime Total
1+
IMDb Member
16 years
Reviews
Blood: The Last Vampire (2009)
This is a film that Uwe Boll would be proud of.
Everything from the acting, to the storyline, to the CG effects would make anyone want to run to the laundry room to try and bleach this movie out of their minds. I was surprised how very little this movie adheres to the anime it was based on. Even the most die-hard fans of the anime would find it hard not to scoff at how horrid this movie adaptation is.
Don't get me wrong, the first 5 minutes of the movie are superb. The whole scene on the subway train is like a teaser of a main entrée guaranteed to appease even the most hearty of appetites.
The problem is: the main entrée never makes it to the plate. It seems that whoever cooked up this idea decided to order up a Taco Bell equivalent storyline, acting, and effects.
If you really want to subject yourself to an hour and a half of pure torture, go about it the right way and go see Bloodrayne.
Don't get me wrong, the first 5 minutes of the movie are superb. The whole scene on the subway train is like a teaser of a main entrée guaranteed to appease even the most hearty of appetites.
The problem is: the main entrée never makes it to the plate. It seems that whoever cooked up this idea decided to order up a Taco Bell equivalent storyline, acting, and effects.
If you really want to subject yourself to an hour and a half of pure torture, go about it the right way and go see Bloodrayne.
Dragonlance: Dragons of Autumn Twilight (2008)
High Expectations, Low Return.
Coming on the tail-end of 2007 and the start of 2008, one would expect a decent amount of increase in quality in animated movies, especially considering the detail and flow of Anime that comes from across the pond, in Japan.
The first 10 seconds had me cringing and praying that the opening Dragonflight was just a basic crappy title-scene. Unfortunately, it was a horrid foreshadowing of what was to be a 90 minute flashback to TV's 1994 "animated" series, "Reboot".
The animation itself was choppy and poorly drawn. It made me believe that we haven't improved anything since the days of Thundercats and He-Man. And then someone had the bright idea to include poorly done CGI into this cesspool of Technicolor Regurgitation! What brain-child thought THIS idea would be cool, nifty, and grand is completely beyond me.
Well, at least I could fall back on the stellar voice acting of Kiefer Sutherland, Michael Rosenbaum, Lucy Lawless, and Michelle Trachtenberg, right? I mean, stars from such shows as 24, Smallville, Xena, and Buffy!! Apparently, these actors must not be able to get into character unless they can actually physically fill the roles of the character they are portraying. The voice acting was lackluster at best. The fight scenes and heated arguments were strained, as if they were trying to yell at themselves in a mirror, and just as equally unbelievable.
The story itself, if you can suffer your eyes and mental capacity long enough to watch it, remains somewhat true to form to the book. Though, if Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman were to actually see this, I'm sure they'd want to be buried so they could start rolling over.
All-in-all, I'd recommend sticking to the book and avoiding this "movie", else you run the risk of ruining a great story you once held in your mind. Pretty much the same way that Lost Boys was totally and completely awesome when I was 13, but watching it 2 weeks ago opened my eyes to how campy and crappy it really is. What a way to ruin my remembrance of two completely awesome titles.
Anyways, I'd have had more enjoyment if someone locked me into a circular room and told me to find a corner to pee in.
The first 10 seconds had me cringing and praying that the opening Dragonflight was just a basic crappy title-scene. Unfortunately, it was a horrid foreshadowing of what was to be a 90 minute flashback to TV's 1994 "animated" series, "Reboot".
The animation itself was choppy and poorly drawn. It made me believe that we haven't improved anything since the days of Thundercats and He-Man. And then someone had the bright idea to include poorly done CGI into this cesspool of Technicolor Regurgitation! What brain-child thought THIS idea would be cool, nifty, and grand is completely beyond me.
Well, at least I could fall back on the stellar voice acting of Kiefer Sutherland, Michael Rosenbaum, Lucy Lawless, and Michelle Trachtenberg, right? I mean, stars from such shows as 24, Smallville, Xena, and Buffy!! Apparently, these actors must not be able to get into character unless they can actually physically fill the roles of the character they are portraying. The voice acting was lackluster at best. The fight scenes and heated arguments were strained, as if they were trying to yell at themselves in a mirror, and just as equally unbelievable.
The story itself, if you can suffer your eyes and mental capacity long enough to watch it, remains somewhat true to form to the book. Though, if Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman were to actually see this, I'm sure they'd want to be buried so they could start rolling over.
All-in-all, I'd recommend sticking to the book and avoiding this "movie", else you run the risk of ruining a great story you once held in your mind. Pretty much the same way that Lost Boys was totally and completely awesome when I was 13, but watching it 2 weeks ago opened my eyes to how campy and crappy it really is. What a way to ruin my remembrance of two completely awesome titles.
Anyways, I'd have had more enjoyment if someone locked me into a circular room and told me to find a corner to pee in.