Renatus77

As I started the movie I quickly realized how terrible this was.

From the very beginning nothing worked. In fact it was so bad that I couldn't stand it and started to watch pieces of it and fast forwarding throughout the entire the movie and you know what's crazy? Even WITH fast forwarding the movie still sucked.

That's when I started to laugh and it hit me. This could be the worst time of your life or a great time. You'll need heavy doses of weed but then this will be a great comedy. Especially the ending, Oh man, prepare to have your friends dial 911 for an ambulance because you might stop breathing from the laughter.

Seriously. An insult to the moviegoer.

Hollywood keeps $hitting out these turds and the movie goer full of hopes to get solid entertainment gets crapped in all five senses.

They spend 85 million on this piece of trash???

David Leitch has only made one above average movie. John Wick.

That movie was already over the top but still managed to keep you entertained. You just went a long with it. Why? Well because a puppy was killed dammit! It worked.

Atomic Blonde was Atomic garbage. Holy smoking turds what a crappy movie.

Fast and Furious Hobbs and whoever other soulless actors name is is again a spit in your face.

Just zero talent in all aspects of those movies. ZERO! Not even a TINY little bit of magic!!

Now we get this Bullet Train with the most unwitty, uncreative formulaic and predictable writing, directing and editing probably in the history of all cinema except maybe for the biggest trash champion of all time. "Everything, Everywhere All At Once." A billion dollars spend on all these soulless movies?

All completely forgettable!

How low can we get? How long is this going to go on?

Kids growing up on these soulless movies will actually think this is what great movies are about. You're ruining their minds with this crap.

Shame on Pitt using himself to promote this trash!

He was fantastic in Moneyball and I like him as I grew up on his films but this is not cool Mr Pitt.

IMO you have a responsibility to your audience. To the people that trust you to be part in a at least above average AUTHENTIC film.

Now as far as the rating and the positive reviews go. I hope truly hope sincerely that they're fake, because if they are real then that means humans are getting dumber and not smarter.

The parts that were good enough made me keep watching.

Mostly I watched for Arnold. I wanted to see how good he could pull off drama. I had already seen "Maggie" so I know he's capable, but I was hoping for that 'captivating" acting. I wanted to see his depths.

I can understand people saying this is his best performance or saying "Hey Arnie can act!" Just because he plays in these over the top action movies doesn't mean he can't act.

People don't seem to understand that you still need to have the chops to perform in those movies. You most def need to know how to act on top of having tons of charisma.

He's really great in those movies. Great in Conan all the way to True Lies.

I think he was decent here, but he was not able to show that depth. That profound suffering in the eyes. That's not easy anyways.

The supporting cast are decent, but some of the casting was really really bad.

The airline reps and lawyers were laughably bad!

It actually messed up the whole movie for me.

I couldn't believe they would ruin the movie like that.

The writing had moments were you felt it was taking you somewhere but then failed to do so. It just kept being anti climatic and disappointing.

I had to keep investing myself into the movie to keep going.

I'm not gonna spoil the end, but the way it ended was like a student film.

Again, I could not believe they would end it like that.

Extremely amateurish and disappointing.

5 stars for Arnie's and the support casts acting.

You can clearly see the ratio.

Yet this movie scores an astonishing 7,2!!

Complete bs of course.

I have not seen this movie. I already have seen too many Jordan Peele movies. It was clear was from the start his movies are quite possibly the worst thing that has happen to Hollywood and cinema. Yes even worse than Roland Emmerich and all other soulless movies. Even worse than all the B and C movies.

This may sound harsh but I mean it when I say Jordan Peele is like a cancer to cinema.

Everything that is cinema is NOT Jordan Peele.

A tragic time for cinema and all the young generations that have to grow up watching this.

Somehow as with many Kings movies you have to accept that the quality of production and talent will be very low but the strange thing is that some part of it, some essence of it keeps you engaged.

Whatever that is I don't know. It's not just the story but something else. Something really eerie.

The best example is The Langoliers. That movie seems so cheaply made it borders a comedy but there's something really creepy about it and that's why I enjoy that movie.

In this case with this movie although it does indeed have part where that eeriness creeps up I just couldn't believe just how bad everything was. I mean everything. The acting, the editing, the score, the characters. It was beyond terrible.

The acting and dialogue are so damn cheesy that for a minute during the second episode I actually questioned if I was being trolled. Maybe this was a joke. This was a parody of sorts and no of course this movie is not serious. It's a comedy masking as drama. I was being fooled. But, no it really is a serious drama. They're all serious about this movie.

While it's clear that opinion on art is subjective I can't help but to be perplexed by people giving this a 7, 8, 9 or even 10.

I wonder if their real lives are just like the the characters in this movie? Creepy!

Kinda fascinated by the good reviews for this movie.

I only watched this to see Clarence Williams III.

This movie sucks tremendously from beginning to end.

What makes it worth watching is the actors.

Not all of them.

Just: Clarence William III, John Glover, Robert Trebor and Vanity.

They have some strong moments and some weak ones but that's due the crappy writing and or directing.

Some of it is indeed hilarious and daring. A lot of nudity and violence for a big studio production with celebrity actors.

I credit them for having the balls to make that.

There's a scene where a kidnapped woman is shot with heroine and she vomits since it's her first time. The kidnapper consoles her and reassures her saying "That' okay, it happens. It's okay. Just don't let it ruin your high." As he says this he taps her on her backside (reassuring her) but then realizes she has a nice ass and does a "Hmmmmm" sound as he squeezes.

Hilarious. Sure, it's brutal but at no point did I take this movie serious.

Clarence Williams III deserved so much more. It's travesty that a man so talented was only able to show his magic on only a handful of films and scenes. He's amazing in Sugar Hill.

Vanity plays the same roles she usually plays. It's easy to label her a just another pretty face, but she does have the chops to play the character.

She's very natural. She has a certain grace.

Most people probably don't see that since she's so sensual and eroticism is such a taboo. Specially in the U. S. They then quickly get dismissed as harlots of the industry. Not the case for me with Vanity.

I was in awe of her beauty in this film. By far one the most beautiful black actresses to be filmed.. Halle Berry doesn't come close. And I think Halle Berry is gorgeous.

Vanity deserved so much more.

4/10. Interesting movie to watch if you're a film lover.

As a hopeless romantic I will gladly admit that I tend to deny the flaws and focus only on the love story to see if it is real or not. Is the chemistry there or not? Are they the real deal or not? Forget the flaws. Does the movie have heart?? That's the only thing that matters. To me at least.

What a beautiful story. Two kids fall in love, without the romance of course because they're still innocent! What better way for true love to manifest than between two innocent children? But is it true love? It's only a matter of time until the knowledge of the world removes their innocence once they reach young adulthood and that love is tested.

Yes, the movie has flaws and gets soapy but for me I focused only on her eyes and his eyes to see if that rare true love magic is there.

I'm a huge critic of films. Not because I'm arrogant but because I have experienced the masters of cinema make magic and pass it on to me through my senses and reach my soul.

Naturally I look to have that same experience again from many movies. I crave it. I can't help it.

As usual I was ready to be disappointed as I am 99% of the time. Though I had to make a little effort to stay in the story every now and then, whenever these two lovers would truly look in each others eyes I would be totally back in it. Epps was great as usual, but Sanaa Lathan would really pull me back in. Probably because I understand what she's feeling (even if I'm a guy).

Though it's a woman's perspective simply because well, she's a woman, love, pain, desire are neither male nor female so I could feel all her agony and suffering and torment. You will too IF you've been there.

Technically 5 stars, but since I'm a hopeless romantic AND because of Lanaa it elevates to 6 stars. (Hey that's big deal for me!)

Coen brothers best film by far. I understand why many would disagree with me. Coen bros have made many quality films, but none of them are as fearless and daring as this one.

I saw this movie as a kid. Many times. Each and every time I would be out of this world and into the film.

A movie like Raising Arizona is almost like a miracle. It's an extremely rare type of movie and must be very difficult to make. The odds of it failing are huge. A movie like this has to blessed by the Gods. Everything simply works. The casting is perfect. The writing is flawless. All the actors are in their element. Cage is truly a master of his craft. Few actors reach his level of fearlessness and range. The camera work is great. It all simply works.

Through the eyes of a child this movie will hypnotize you.

Now that I'm older and understand all the elements of film making (and acting!) I'm also able to appreciate the amount of work and dedication that has gone into it and of course like I said the blessing of the Gods.

I'm amazed at these terrible scores and reviews.

It's seems there's some type of directed hate towards this film.

Probably something I'm not aware of. Something about winning a prize. Politics or race maybe I don't know and I don't care.

It's quite simple.

If you have ever truly fallen in love and have lost half of your heart then you know the sweet taste of heaven and the bitter taste of hell.

That's a life fully lived. The bittersweet life. Without one (sweet) the other (bitter) has no meaning.

Only when you live the bittersweet life and wake up to endure it day after day and night after night, then you will understand this film.

This masterpiece. It truly is beautiful and authentic.

One the one hand hand I wish for you who do not understand to live the bittersweet life so you can understand.

On the other hand I would be wishing hell on you as well.

All we have left in the bittersweet life is too watch the beautiful sun, set in the evening and rise in the morning in agony and gratitude.

Halle Berry goes down..... and not just in the ring.

She goes down on a woman named Buddhakan from U.k. Yes of course she meditates. Hence the Buddha part. The kan part? I don't know. Genghis Khan maybe?

Utterly hilarious.

Evil dies tonight? If not tonight will it ever? Well that's up to you!

How you ask? You think Michael Meyers is the evil one?

No, he's not.

It's the people that keep giving birth to these soulless, uninspiring art forsaken lobotomized movies. And you keep feeding it!

Michael Myers is probably begging Hollywood to please finish him off once and for all as he's become the laughing stock of horror cinema.

Whatever he had that was truly frightening was removed after the original Halloween.

That's why there's only one true Halloween for me. John Carpenter's 1978.

The only reason to watch the rest is for Donald Pleasence. What an amazing actor. And without him there is no Halloween since Curtis, Pleasence and Myers are the trifecta of the Halloween experience.

But knowing Hollywood they won't stop and you'll keep buying their (outrageously overpriced) movie tickets.

So, soulless studios at this point you can just keep making these parodies. Let's turn it up a notch and really rake in those big bucks.

I have some ideas for you.

Halloween: Halloween In Da Hood "The Crips and The Bloods make peace and join forces to fight off this evil crazy white mutha#$@&$% who apparently walked all the way from Haddonfield, Illinois to Los Angeles"

Halloween: Electric Boogaloo needs no tag

Halloween In Space "After being unable to kill Michael Myers on earth, humans are forced to shoot him into space where he terrorizes the entire universe"

Halloween In Space: The Revenge "Aliens decide to take revenge on humans and place one of their own in a spaceship called The Nostromo setting off an endless chain of Alien franchise movies"

Halloween : All colors of the rainbow "Years of therapy have finally paid off. Michael is now Michaella.

She has fully transgendered and is seeking forgiveness of all she has done while competing to be number one as Master Chef. She's also top five largest followers on Twitter and Instagram."

ps. No disrespect to the actors. Curtis, Hall, Patton all icons and awesome actors.

If they are producers as well, that's another story.

Carpenter is listed as executive but in an interview he says he's done nothing but give his blessing. I don't blame him. He just likes to work (he did the score) and be part of something. He's not gonna say anything negative on anyone. Deep down he knows (and we know) what he's created with his classics and no one has topped that in the generations after him. Not even close. A true and living legend of cinema.

This is Abel Ferrara.

If you know him and his movies you should know what he's about.

He does whatever he wants.

Someone in the reviews said he was probably high. Maybe he was. He was while filming Bad Lieutenant. So was half the crew probably.

That's an amazing movie. Even if they were all shooting up heroine every scene. It's a masterpiece.

That's a movie with a plot and a straight line. You will be entertained.

That's a movie you can rate.

This is not a movie you can rate. If you do it's either a 1 or a 10.

Doesn't really matter.

This is not a movie you will enjoy.

This movie you will not be entertained. At least not the conventional and typical way you're use to.

And that's what you want. What you crave for. You think you're not dependent on any drug? What do you think entertainment is?

A drug that numbs you and helps you look away and forget. Just for a little while. Just for the usual 90 minutes.

This is not that.

In Zero's and Ones Ferrara is obviously channeling something so huge he could never truly capture it onscreen. It easily becomes cryptic. Absurdity takes over. If you think about it the essence of human life and particularly the mind is absurd.

Zeros and Ones. The title probably points to the message.

Binary. All computer data is a combination of zeros and ones.

Maybe life is too. But I'm not gonna go there since I don't know for sure. You'll have to go there by yourself. Most will not and I don't blame them.

In the Matrix most people would rather stay in the world created by zero's and ones. Few will have the courage to go deeper into the rabbit-hole. After all, you don't know what you'll find and instead stay safe in the life you know and were born into.

The Vatican is full of secrets. Maybe that's the place to look for answers?

At some point it seems you will be forced to anyways.

Look at the state of the world today. The greater the madness the greater the force to inquire into the source.

With Covid19 that madness just got a little bit bigger.

Predictable and typical. Tries too hard. Over the top.

I understand why so many like this movie. It's a little different from other movies that they are used to watching. Especially for kids of this generation who are bombarded with copy paste and remakes and reboots.

Every time I watch a movie the odds of me actually loving it are very slim.

Every single scene I have to be engaged, surprised, moved or even just interested. Usually I'm just annoyed.

The intro in this was good. I got my hopes up as I felt that this could actually be a decent flick.

That feeling did not last though.

It just kept getting worse and worse.

It became a mess of a story.

The casting was off too EXCEPT for a couple of actors and the reason I'm glad this movie was made... I was happy to see Mr Stamp and very happy to see Diana Rigg.

What an amazing career she had and I'm sad she's gone now.

Although I wasn't born when the Avengers was on tv , whenever I watch it I get very nostalgic. She was so beautiful and charismatic.

Now the best reason for this movie being made is the talented Thomasin!

She was amazing together with Ben Foster in Leave No Trace (2018).

Now that was well made film! Superbly acted by Foster as usual but I was very moved by Thomasins character.

I hope I see more of her. I really hope she can star in a movie where she'll be able to truly show what I know she's capable of.

I knew this movie was gonna suck before I even pressed play.

That's just because I'm pretty much always disappointed with new movies.

But I have to give it a shot. You never know, this might actually be that one movie where when the credits roll I just sit there in awe while all these emotions pass through and I think , thank you! Thank you director, writer, producer, actor and everyone involved.

Alas, and not surprising, this is not that movie.

Right in the first scene Will Smith walks in. Really? Right off the bat??

I mean not even the worst of the worst movies in history did that.

Will Smith does what he always does.

I've always enjoyed watching him. I grew up watching Fresh Prince. He's one hell of an entertainer. He always had that confidence in himself and that shows in his acting.

Watching this movie though I immediately found myself not liking him.

Did it finally happen? Did I finally get tired of watching him do the same thing he's always done but somehow never got tired of it? Pretty amazing that I lasted all this time.

I don't think it's him though. I think it's just this crappy movie.

If he's given a another great role in a movie with a heart (or at least quality action) he'd be back.

So yeah, this movie has no heart. No soul. Just like 99.9% of movies that come out nowadays. A real shame since the Williams tennis sisters from Compton is truly an amazing story.

It's a typical Netflix type of movie quick money maker without any decent character development, terrible directing and even worse score.

2 stars for the young girls acting. I hope they've enjoyed working on this and if it's their dream to keep going that it will happen.

I have seen all of Villenueves films except Dune. All of his films have huge potential BUT there's ALWAYS something lacking. In the beginning his films were smaller and somewhat more authentic. They seem to go somewhere and you get excited hoping that this movie will finally be a movie that will move you. They don't. It's extremely disappointing.

As his career took off he got bigger actors and a bigger budget. None of it helps. It actually seems to make the quality of the films worse.

I have not seen Dune but I can already predict it's not gonna be able to move me, as usual.

Just look at the cast.

None of them have the chops to make it happen except Bardem and Rampling but they're not in their element in these types of movies.

Bardem is one of the greatest actors that has walked the earth (that has been recorded on film) but just look at his role as a villain in James Bond. None of his magic came across. Watch his Spanish movies and witness his ability. He's truly amazing.

Dune 2021 is typical Hollywood trying to sell tickets (can't blame them, that's what they do mostly) by casting Chalomet who's definitely talented but is just not ready. Bautista, Zendaya, I barely know them but they're just there because of their popularity with teenagers.

Most of you will not agree with me rating a movie without having seen it first and I would agree with you. It's just that I have seen thousand of movies and have been let down for many of them. At this point I can see a pattern and can make predictions based on the past work of the directors, writers, actors and dp's and of course the typical machine that is Big Budget Box Office Hollywood.

The 3 stars is for the special effects. I predict they're going to be the highlight of the film. The acting is going to be worst though (I've seen the trailer) but the directing might take that prize.

If I'm totally off I would be TRULY shocked and I will apologize and change the rating accordingly. I'll keep this original post, I won't delete it like a coward.

This is garbage. I don't understand how this can have an 8.6 rating.

Deadwood is infinitely better and I rate that about an 8.

From the first episode I concluded it was trash. I still stuck around for another 5 episodes thinking/hoping that maybe I was missing something or it was about to change. It didn't.

Trash.

I had totally forgotten about this movie. I looked it up after seeing the trailer for "Annette" (2021).

This movie sucked so bad.

Hollywood has been in a decline for a long time now.

Kids and don't realize it since they grew up watching these garbage films. Same with vegetated adults that only go to the cinema once a month to catch the latest blockbuster flick.

So they keep supporting these movies. Hollywood keeps making their billions.

This movie (and all like it) are the lowest of the lowest. They are anti cinema.

There's not a single dash or sprinkle or atom of pure heart and creativity in this entire film. Nothing. Zero. It has no soul. It's a forced. It's all generic. Formulaic. Fake. An insult to cinema. An insult to humanity. Hell it's even an insult to popcorn.

It targets the "lowest common denominator". If you rated this high than that's you.

Everyone involved in this abomination (except maybe catering) should be ashamed.

If you truly liked this movie there may not be any hope left for you.

This was a sh!itshow from beginning to end. Just cringe level 9000 Hitchcock wannabe.

The acting was atrocious. Even Oldman couldn't be bothered with decent acting.

I already predicted all of this. If it's Netflix it's just gonna be bad or way below average. Why though?

I love Rutger. I always have and always will.

This was a really bad movie. Nothing worked. The story, the editing, the action.

All flat. The score made no sense.

Even Rutgers acting just wasn't really there.

You'll see glimpses of Rutgers charisma here and there.

Too bad!

I can't believe what started like an innocent and average at best cheesy teen sex comedy suddenly when I least expected hit me like a ton of reality bricks.

When the credits rolled I just stared at the screen...in a daze.

Any hint will give it away. Don't read reviews. Just watch it...or don't.

(edit: I forgot to mention I'm reviewing the ORIGINAL ENDING here, not the theatrical which is the version most people have seen (or are going to see).

The original ending is completely different from the theatrical.)

How F###iing awesome this movie is!

It's full of messages and metaphors.

The movie warns you to never ever "feed the plant" no matter what riches it promises you. I've heard that before.

The effects are great and the puppetry masterful! It's so amazing to witness real effects after being bombarded with so much soulless cgi the last 10 years.

Plus I had no idea it would end like that. Pretty insane.

Today's society would never have the balls to make a movie and END a movie like this.

Watch this movie as an adult to understand the metaphors but with the heart of a child or you will miss the point (and the fun!) and end up giving ridiculous, negative and serious critique like some reviewers here.

7/10 just for the actors and the score. The (main) characters choices made me wanna rip all my hairs out , yes that includes my ball hairs so you know it's bad. The decisions the characters make are forcing conflict so hard down your throat that you just stop caring all together about any resolution. Sure, all movies eventually are written to create conflict and possible resolution but this was just ridiculous. Still I enjoyed some of it simply because Bjork gives her soul here. The woman is simply amazing in everything she does.

Hanks: "Left full rudder! All ahead flank!" "Bearing, range? What?" "Harry Dicky!" Butler named Cleveland: "Sir, I made you pancakes. They're actually still warm somehow." Crew kid: "Torpedo!" Hanks: "Where?" Butler named Cleveland: "Right here sir and I made coffee! it's still warm!" Hanks: "I mean torpedo where?" "We don't know sir." Hanks: "Right Full Rudder!" "NO, left full starboard bearing 69! "All ahead flank!" "Bring my mittens, not the silk, but the wool. Scratch that they're too itchy. Bring the sheepskin ones!" "Starboard flank!" "Left full halfmast rudder flank 1,5 knots."

45 minutes later:

Evil Nazi Submarine wolverine captain through intercom: "Mr Hanks! You will all die in the middle of the night while you are warm in your beds dreaming about hamburgers and milkshakes! We like to kill people just for fun! We are evil! Tonight you will all die. You cannot escape! MUahahahaahahaha . Did I mention we are evil?" Hanks: (with a face that expresses love, fear, passion, uncertainty, frostbite, (or maybe his feet are just killing him) "Left right flanking rudders!" "Hard right rudder! Hard over! Steer course 110! Flank their rudders!" "Brace for impact and bring me my slippers." Butler named Cleveland: "Here's a bacon and egg sandwich sir! Miraculously its still warm. Better eat it since I'm not gonna be around much longer. After all, I'm the token black guy and must be killed off soon!" Hanks: "Harry Dicky! I want you to come!" "Left full rudder all the way home!" (Where are my slippers?)

Just like a book (or most art) you can tell in the first minutes whether the movie will capture you or not. I lasted 20 mins. There's simply no magic. None of it works. Nevertheless thank you, Ms Gerwig.