patmcgroinnow

My buds and I were looking for something to fill the void in our empty lives. I just got my man-cave finished and the little lady was away with the kids. It was time to tie one on. My job sucks and I hate my boss. His daughter is my immediate manager. She's built like a land- grader and is as ugly as a gravel road. She's also continually sexually harassing me. I'd like to get my revenge for the many times she's belittled me in front of my co-workers or made me shine her patent leather gym shoes. That's where Ritual comes in.

The kegolater was installed yesterday. It was filled to the max with ice cold Yeungling. My buddy Hank Hill had gotten in a shipment of some of the best doobie this side of Mendocino. He rolls some of the fattest blunts you've ever seen. We all have med licenses for weed...naturally....but wished we had one to maim, disembowel, kill or at least commit manslaughter. I'm an open book when it comes to revenge and my friends follow my lead.I am the alpha. Those who have strayed from my will are disappeared. Anyways....

Cookie Algonquin had gone to Mexico a few weeks previously and bought some of these killer goon masks. Won the money at a cock-fight and, for the first time, decided not to spend it on a bunch of lap dances from the greasy whores in Tiajauna. Good choice.

Another friend brought in a little film he'd heard good things about called Ritual. Another even better choice. We all got totally heavy-lidded wasted....put on those masks and, after the movie, went to a local motel, where this blond bomber was cheating on her husband. She looked like a better version of my boss's daughter but my revenge gene had taken over. The rest is history....but so far we haven't been caught. Watch this movie, You won't regret it. Pass the dutchie.