I think a lot of people judge this special a bit too harshly. If you're going to compare it to the original Frosty the Snowman, then sure, you'll be disappointed, so you have to judge Frosty Returns as a stand-alone story, because that's what it is. Other than being about a living snowman named Frosty, it has nothing to do with the Ranklin/Bass trilogy. Even though it's considered a Christmas special, it really has nothing to do with the holiday, unlike the other Frosty specials. Christmas isn't even mentioned, but it still captures the spirit in its own way. So, what is Frosty Returns about? Other than Frosty returning? Where did he return from? They never say, he just abruptly shows up, but I'm getting ahead of myself. Our story takes place in the small town of Beansboro, where our narrator, a miniaturized Jonathan Winters, sets the scene. This is a town that loves its winter, and the kids love the snow, although the grown ups think it's literally a pain, having to shovel it all day long. While all the other kids were outside throwing snowballs at each other, a young girl named Holly decided to stay inside. See, Holly is an aspiring magician and she wants to show her stuff at the annual winter carnival. Her first trick will be placing her nerdy friend Charles in a box and cutting off his head... okay, Holly, usually when a box is involved, you saw the subject in half, not decapitate him. You're a magician, not Jigsaw. Thankfully her second-degree murder is interrupted by an open window, which blows her tophat off her head and out into the cold. She goes out to get it, leaving poor Charles in the box. Out on the street, she bumps into her teacher, Miss Carbuncle, and she is HILARIOUS. We need more of Miss Carbuncle. Also, is it me or does she look exactly like that old lady on the Hallmark cards? Anyway, Holly eventually comes across her hat, which is sitting atop a snowman just standing around in a field, but when she tries to grab it, the snowman comes to life and tells her to take his bowtie instead. This is Frosty, by the way. Like I said, he just abruptly shows up. Where did he come from? How is he alive, since it soon becomes obvious that it's not the hat that keeps him living this time around. Well, before we can get any explanations, Holly's mom shows up and shames her for abandoning Charles, then she shows off the greatest invention "since microwave pancakes". At least she didn't say "sliced bread", after all it IS the '90s. This so-called great invention is called Summer Wheeze, an aerosol canned substance that can dissolve snow within seconds. Summer Wheeze, invented by the ruthless Mr. Twitchell, a corporate tycoon who wants to do away with the white stuff, and make plenty of the green stuff. He even has trucks driving up and down the streets, spraying sidewalks. I'm sure the EPA would love this guy. I doubt it's been tested and will probably wreak havoc on the environment, but the citizens of Beansboro don't seem to care. Yes, Mr. Big Corporation, spray that crap in our yards, pollute our air, it'll sure save our backs. So if anything, this special has a good message about commercialism, so I guess it is a Christmas special after all.
At school the next day, Holly had planned to spread the word of how important snow was to this town, and while her friend Charles certainly agreed, the rest of the kids had hopped on the No Snow bandwagon. In short, Holly chickened out, so Frosty sings her a motivational song. All the while, Mr. Twitchell, who has a weird relationship with his cat, rides around in his limo, singing his own praises and knowing he'll be crowned king at the weekend's winter carnival. Well, as Darth Vader would say, "be careful not to choke on your aspirations." It's also at this point that Holly introduces Charles to Frosty, and this is a boy who only focuses on the scientific and realistic aspects of the world, and so a talking, singing snowman is a concept that's hard for him to grasp at first. Well, he'd better hurry, because old man Twitchell happens to drive by and see them, and his first reaction to seeing a living snowman is to blast him with a can of Wheeze. Man, imagine what he'd do if he met Bigfoot. Spray him with Nair? He sends his cat to do the deed because he's too lazy, and while Frosty and the kids manage to hide in time, the snowman takes a shot to the gut. Fortunately, Charles kept a huge bag of snow in his freezer... as you do, and they patch him up. Good, crisis solved in seconds. But what to do about this town's sudden dislike for snow, or when Dr. Evil rides in to be crowned king at the carnival? The kids and Frosty come up with a plan, and at the carnival, they reveal Frosty to the crowd, showing just how magical snow can be. Ahh, so it's the SNOW itself that's keeping Frosty alive? I mean, seriously, why isn't it the hat? It was the hat in the other cartoons, and even in the blessed song. Anyway, Twitchell won't stand to be foiled, so he and his cat attempt to annihilate the snowman, but end up crashing a truck into a frozen pond. Idiots. Needless to say, Frosty is crowned king and he and the kids take a ride in the royal sleigh, still singing their "Let There Be Snow" song, though for some reason they cringe every time Charles sings. Why? He doesn't sound any different than the others. So, a half-frozen Twitchell admits defeat and the gang shows him kindness by letting him ride in the sleigh, as it was time for Frosty to move on. Guess whatever mission he was on was completed. I guess that's why he came to Beansboro, he somehow knew the winter carnival as well as the town's snowfall would be in jeopardy... yet, he clearly didn't know that beforehand. But then, none of us really knows why we are where we are or what our mission in life truly is. Satirical and prophetic, what are you critics talking about? This special is brilliant! So Frosty moves on, Mr. Twitchell goes into the sledding business, and our narrator moves on to Winnipeg, where their cocoa is much more plentiful.
In closing, Frosty Returns is a decent special. It isn't as good as the 1969 Frosty the Snowman or its two followups, and like I said, it would be unfair to compare it to what's come before. This one has to stand on its own. Besides, if you want a BAD Frosty special, look at 2005's The Legend of Frosty the Snowman, that one is even worse, because even though they made Frosty look like he did in the Ranklin/Bass cartoon, it had nothing to do with it. The animation and voice acting in it is terrible, and for some reason, they made Frosty sound like Patrick Star. As for Frosty Returns, the animation is acceptable, as it's by the same people who made the Peanuts specials. As for voice acting, everyone does their job well. There's Andrea Martin as Miss Carbuncle, Jan Hooks as Holly's mom, a young Elisabeth Moss as Holly, Jonathan Winters as our amusing narrator, Brian Doyle Murray as Mr. Twitchell, who you may recall played another greedy corporate tycoon who cared very little for those around him in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, and just like in that movie, Murray's character learns a valuable lesson and reforms. He was also in Scrooged, where he played Frank's father. Huh, I guess Brian Doyle Murray is just as much a part of Christmas as Peter Billingsley. Finally, we've got John Goodman as Frosty, taking over the role from the late Jackie Vernon. Goodman does a decent job and brings the snowman to life with plenty of spirit. Now, since the hat clearly wasn't Frosty's life force this time around, I'm guessing it was that bowtie he despised. I mean, seriously, how could the writers goof on that? Well, its faults aside, I still recommend Frosty Returns, as it's a worthy successor to the originals, so long as you allow it to stand on its own.
