Photos
Quotes
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Hawkeye : [playacting] "What did you do in the war, Daddy?"
Hawkeye : "I was latrine officer, son. My outfit never made a move without me!"
Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre : [throwing papers into the stove] Hey, should we leave in the staples?
Hawkeye : Damn the staples, man. This is war. Everyone has to live dangerously.
Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre : [the door opens and lets in a blast of cold air. Radar comes in with men carrying cots] Hey, close the door!
Cpl. Walter "Radar" O'Reilly : Okay, guys, put 'em right in here.
Hawkeye : What's going on?
Cpl. Walter "Radar" O'Reilly : [holding up clipboard] New sleeping arrangements, by order of Corporal O'Reilly, housing officer.
Cpl. Walter "Radar" O'Reilly : [Trapper grabs the clipboard and throws it in the stove] Hey!
Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre : By order of Captain McIntyre, heating officer.
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Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre : [Blake and Radar come into the Swamp for the night] Colonel Blake's party!
Hawkeye : We have your reservation, sir. A single bed for yourself and a cradle for your son.
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Let's not have a lot of tongue-wagging in here tonight.
Cpl. Walter "Radar" O'Reilly : Which bed should I take, sir?
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Well, let me face away from everybody, Radar, on account of me snoring.
Hawkeye : Oh, lovely!
Army Capt. "Trapper John" McIntyre : Henry, you're joking.
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Joking? Heh. I could be on the Olympic Snoring team. I snored the siding half off of my house. I even got a fan letter once from the seismograph people at Fordham.
Hawkeye : How are we supposed to sleep with that?
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Well, if it gets too bad, just do what my wife does.
Hawkeye : What's that?
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : [smiling] Hold me close!
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Radar : [as Hawkeye and Trapper wrestle with Frank Burns, for his battery-warmed socks] They're hunting socks, sir.
Henry Blake : At this hour?
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Lt. Col. Henry Blake : [Henry sits down at his desk, which is now a foot shorter] Radar, am I getting taller or is the room shrinking?
Cpl. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly : Somebody cut the legs off, sir.
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Oh, that's dirty pool.
Cpl. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly : Well they'll burn anything to keep warm, sir.
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : I know, but to cut off a man's legs and steal his drawers...
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Capt. 'Trapper John' McIntyre : What's going on?
Cpl. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly : New sleeping arrangements by order of Corporal O'Reilly, housing officer.
[Trapper grabs Radar's clipboard and throws it into the furnace]
Cpl. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly : Hey!
Capt. 'Trapper John' McIntyre : By order of Captain McIntyre, heating officer.
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Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Radar, what's the poop on the overall situation, status-wise?
Cpl. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly : Oh, we're not too bad, sir. The food's holding out and the fueI's okay. We are having a little trouble with the... T-paper shortage.
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Oh?
Cpl. Walter 'Radar' O'Reilly : People are breaking into the fortune cookies.
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Cpl. Walter "Radar" O'Reilly : Here you go, sir.
[hands a clipboard to Col. Blake]
Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Radar, give me this here clipboard I got here.